Simply too, too!

We are beside ourselves. Behold the following "Middle America" entry from the Thesaurus.com application on Dictionary.com, which cites the 2008 edition of Roget's New Millennium Thesaurus as its source:

Main Entry: Middle America
Part of Speech: noun
Definition: general populice
Synonyms: bourgeoisie, silent majority, subtopia, suburbia, the burbs

Perhaps, like us, you realize that it is unconscionable for a dictionary to have a spelling error, even if said dictionary is online (although it should be noted that Dictionary.com purports to draw from, and rigorously cites, renowned published dictionaries). Perhaps, this discovery has shaken you to your very foundations and you find yourself wondering aloud, "If one cannot trust the dictionary, whom can one trust?" Rest assured, dear readers, when all else fails, The Grammar Wall of Shame will not let you down.

This is only the second offense in The Grammar Wall of Shame's history to merit the designation, We Are (Almost) Speechless. If it pleases you to replay in your mind the scene from Mary Poppins where Mr. Banks is thrown out of the bank, substituting Dictionary.com for Mr. Banks, please do so.

Who but the AP?

We came across this surprising slip-up in an AP article on FoxSports.com titled, "Zednik awake after surgery on severed artery":

"Attending surgeon Sonya Noor said there were no initial signs of brain damage, which is a fear whenever the coratid artery is clamped."

Some readers might be tripped up by what they perceive to be a spelling error; however, we at The Grammar Wall of Shame can only stand in wonder at the marvels of modern medical-metaphysical mastery, wherein doctors can perform elaborate surgeries on body parts that do not exist. We're not sure which degree program prepares eager young minds for such feats, but it sounds...challenging. Is challenging the word we're looking for?

For this error, the AP is awarded a C for Creative Spelling and the following Drunken Proofreading rating:

*** (three stars) - I needed a shot just to look myself in the mirror this morning.

It's that time of year again!

We found this example of AutoCorrect Syndrome in an article titled, "Romney suspends presidential campaign":

"He then told the crowd he disagrees with McCain on a number of issues, but that he'd given the mater a lot of thought and if he fought on all the way to the Republican convention, 'I forestall the launch of a national campaign and frankly I'd be making it easier for Senator Clinton or Obama to win.'"

Breaking news from the AP: Mitt Romney really loves his mother. We find that to be very moving, although we fail to see what she has to do with the campaign. Wait, is something Manchurian going on here? Somebody check the location of Angela Lansbury.

For this little slip-up, we hereby award the AP an Oops! Is my lazy showing?, a Totally Giggleworthy, and the following Drunken Proofreading rating:

**** (four stars) - Yesh, I take thish waterbottle everywhere I go. It'sh water. No, you can't have any.

Unpardonable Product: Safeway

We won't even touch the question of whether such an item would be palatable to the taste buds; it's unpalatable to the discriminating mind, and that's enough for us. We beg you, do the world a favor and find another low-guilt ice cream to satisfy your craving.

Introducing: Unpardonable Products

Now that the Christmas shopping gorge has concluded, we would like to take this opportunity to introduce a new category that is particularly product-related. Unpardonable Products are those whose product names involve such outrageous assaults on the English language that they ought never to be purchased by a grammar-loving individual, as a matter of principle if nothing else. Help us send a message to the companies producing these products that such egregious violations of grammatical taste will not be tolerated!

We are grateful to be able to do our part in encouraging responsible consumption.

The AP: Too good to resist!

We are having a hard time keeping ourselves from laughing out loud at this error, which we found in an AP article titled, "Sources: Mitchell Report to name MVPs, All-Stars, won't address amphetamines":

"The Web site cited an unidentifried source close to the trainer."

We confess, we are not exerting ourselves very strenuously to keep from laughing; we are mostly just laughing inappropriately and getting some strange looks from the gentleman refilling the vending machine. We are aware that this error is likely due to the fact that the writer was rushing to break a story about baseball steroid use (snore); nonetheless, um, spell check? Anyone?

The AP earns a Totally Giggleworthy, C for Creative Spelling, an Oops! Is my lazy showing? and the following Drunken Proofreading rating:

**** (four stars) - Yesh, I take thish water bottle everywhere I go. It'sh water. No, you can't have any.

Good Times at The American Interest

We came across the following error in an otherwise excellent piece in The American Interest titled, "On Forgetting the Obvious":

"A non-warrior democracy with a limited appetite for casualties is probably a good thing in terms of putting the breaks on a directionless war strategy."

This homographic hiccup is almost cute, really. Breaks, brakes--tee hee*. We would almost rather consider it as an invitation to The Grammar Wall of Shame - a private challenge between The American Interest and us. Well done, mesdames et messieurs. Challenge accepted and met.

Nevertheless, The American Interest has earned itself an Oops! Is my Lazy Showing? and the following Drunken Proofreading Rating:

*** (three stars) - I needed a shot just to look myself in the mirror this morning.


*It must be stated that in the interest of accuracy, and recognizing that we too can err in these matters, we did some research to make certain that this usage was indeed incorrect. While there are many and varied uses of the word break, we have now satisfied ourselves that this usage is improper, although we must confess that, after reading 122 definitions and uses, the word break no longer looks like a word at all. We invite you to read for yourself.